— 26th September 2003
I got some great spam the other day. It was sent to me by someone called “Weightloss Soap” and the subject line was "Lose Weight While Taking A Shower".
Well not one to be overly self-congratulatory about my body mass I decided that I might benefit from such a product and clicked on the link contained within. I was taken to a brightly coloured (slightly retro looking) web site where there was a picture of the aforementioned soap (it was pink and boxy, quite like most other soap I’ve seen) and some blurb which basically repeated the subject line of the e-mail with a little elaboration and some quotes taken from some previous customers and some people called Dr and Professor. There was some instructions at the bottom of page which said that all I needed to do was fill in my name and address and credit card number and they’d rush me my soap. It sounded very efficient so I filled in the details and pressed [SUBMIT].
I was taken to another page which informed me that the soap was on it’s way and that I would be charged $60 for the bar, and a further $20 for delivery (because it was being shipped from America). I was initially quite shocked at these amounts but I thought if the soap works I would probably agree that it was worth it.
It took about 3 days to arrive which I thought was very good. I actually noticed that the postmark on the box was from Nottingham, but I suppose they sent it to Nottingham first and then on from there. The box was quite small and contained the bar of soap wrapped in something like a sandwich bag and a small piece of pink paper. On this paper someone had handwritten (which I thought was a nice touch) "use like normal soap".
I’ve been using it every morning now for almost a week and dutifully weighing myself each day after my shower. I haven’t lost any weight but I seem to be far cleaner than I used to be.